That was so much fun, I would love to try again. My husband has tried ballroom dancing before though and said it was a disaster. In a sad twist on the ballet setback of yours, he has a strong martial arts background. Here he is already rather nervous and many moves in dancing are a lot like throws… well when you are nervous your best known reflexes take over. He stopped at that point.

Done true to its roots, swing dancing is also all about lead and follow, every bit as much as tango.

(But many places do “ballroomized” swing dancing, which is different.)

I think this post might relate to your slightly later post about critical thinking. There is no logical deduction in the lead-and-follow communication, but there is a great deal of learning not to second guess what someone else is about to do. That’s a valuable thing to practice, and a great aid to clear discussion of ideas!

We and our swing dancing friends would much rather spend a song doing fewer fancy moves with a more solid sense of “connection”. What makes swing dancing fun for us is the communication, not the dance steps. Besides talking to your partner (it is a social dance, after all) you are in communication with your partner’s movement, with the musicality of the song, and with the floor. That’s four things to concentrate on! No wonder it is difficult to do well.

The big think about ballrom dancing is to have a good “connection” to your partner, whoever they are. Not a romantic connection. In fact, you can have a good connection with a complete stranger, as it’s a learned thing (it has a lot to do with the proper level of tension in the arms, placement of hands, and posture). It’s the connection that allows the leader to lead, and the follower to follow, all the while apearing to everyone else to be anticipating the leader’s every next move.

Good fun!

If your average man knew how impressed women are by a physically confident man who can lead (as expressed in dancing) well they would all be at dance class.

Your comments (and others’ comments) about “leader” and “follower” remind me of something Gov. Ann Richards in Texas once said. “Women can do anything a man can do…in high heels and moving backwards.” (BTW, I’m a Republican).

Neo…come on down to Texas. We’ll teach you how to do the C&W Texas Two Step. After a couple of Shiner Dark Beers, if you aren’t doing it right, at least you’ll THINK you are doing it right!

On the other hand, my knowledge of rhythm from marching and musical style from band gives me a very good ability to figure what’s going on in the music at a given point and where it’s likely to go. Her knowledge of ballet allows her to do spins and other moves far more gracefully and with more daring than most others would consider.

it’s the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it.

As a guy, I naturally hadn’t thought of that in my 52 years on this planet, but, yes, I suppose so. I spent most of 1994 in Buenos Aires. I was frankly a horrible tango dancer in comparison to many. (The milonga is easier.) But it sure was fun.

The music and the lyrics of those tangos written in the 20s and 30s can be simply outstanding. Cole Porter, only in Spanish. I can’t even describe it.

“Dancing is a wonderful training for girls, it’s the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it.”

A valuable skill in many areas of life!

Occasionally, I get to see a very experienced pair of dancers Tango. The Tango requires both dancers to stand very close to each other, and must move in near-perfect syncronicity. It has an elegant grace if it is done properly, but requires a good deal of trust between the dancers.

Swing, on the other hand, has the couple stand slightly apart, and allows much more freedom of movement of motion. It still requires trust, but requires it in a different way.

Dancing is fun–I dance mostly to help me enjoy certain kinds of music more fully.

Most couples’ dances have a leader and a follower (usually male and female, respectively). The leader sets the pace, keeps the beat with his feet, and communicates to the follower with his hands and his posture.

It’s off the air now and I don’t know if it’s coming back on, but I hope it does. Because the instructors stay the same and subjects change every week, there’s a nice flow without things getting boring. The first thing I learned about ballroom from the show is that it’s very hard work, and doubly hard for the men who have to learn how to lead — it always struck me as unfair when they had women competing against the men.

Tango was one of the dances they learned, along with cha-cha, jive, waltz, and rhumba. At first glance you think that tango would be easier than, say, jive (which is so fast!) but then it becomes obvious that it’s not. None of them are easy!

I think you would like the show if you had a chance to watch it. I hope you go back to tango lessons, and then let us know how it goes — what an opportunity for vicarious thrills!

a weird sort of dichotomy

These dance names all sound so exotic.

I watch a lot of dual ice skating and that’s always fun to watch. The dynamics are principally the same as a choreographed tango with improvisation, but the consequences of failure are much greater.

Relating to martial arts and ballet, it just seems that ballet is a singular expression of discipline and form, whilst duality systems are mirrors and focusing effects. Where trust, balance, and perpetual motion are in effect.

The woman has to trust the man not to screw up, the man has to trust the woman not to screw up, and neither can show any doubt or allow doubt to interfere with their reactions and actions. It is thus, what people have known in ages past so easily yet twas so hard to understand. That things can be greater than the sum of their parts.

It reminds me of mirror dance.

However, in watching some really good tango dancers, I was impressed by a number of things. One of them is that the man is in control, entirely, including his patented dominating expression. Or, if he isn’t, the dance makes it look so.
Any feminists complained about the tango?

“Mom was working around the house, humming a tune. The little one asked, “Mommy, what’s that song?”

Mommy answered, “I Wonder Who’s Kissing Her Now”

The little one then asked, “Mommy, where’s YOUR now?”

C’mon Steve! Where’s Dr. de la Vega? You’re asleep at the switch here while Ms. Neo-neocon is pontificating about running dog capitalist forms of dance designed to globalise the entertainment industry and further America’s corporate profit driven neo-colonialism at the expense of the misunderstood “others”. Man, you guys are a disappointment.

And where’s Ymarsakar’s insight on this? And the usual and customary sniping from a platoon of “Anonymous” posters? Where is everybody today?

Have you watched The Tango Lesson? The woman had to have her house remodeled so she left for Argentina to learn the tango. Would we be so lucky!

The Follow, the more difficult position to be in (remember the Ginger Rogers idea), has to understand body and dance movement, but should not try to think about dancing. When things fall apart on the dance floor I tell my partner to sing so that she does not try to figure what I’m doing. That thinking slows her reaction time down and sets her back even more.

I’ve been taking lessons for 5 1/2 years (today is my 57th birthday), so I know that the more senior generation can learn this and excel. She and I have danced for the last 2 1/2 years and we regularly get comments on our dancing. One issue I have found is that Good Dancers Dance Large — big frames and confident steps driving you down the dance floor. The motion allows you to get “into” the dance and helps you cover errors more easily.

Enjoy the dancing … find a partner with whom you can find pleasurable dancing.

I couldn’t understand some parts of this article, but it sounds interesting…