And “seeking out the poor reporters, where the ragged people go” from “The Boxer” (seeking out the poorer quarters . . )

I’m in the mood for love
Simply because you’re near me.

Funnybutt when you’re near me
I’m in the mood for love.

For instance, I was pleased to hear that the economy was improving, since orders for gerbil goods were up in the last month.

And I would swear that the DJ on a classical station once announced the Haydn Traffic Concerto.

John Fogerty has been known to intentionally sneak this version of the lyric into live performances. One example is on his Premonition live album. When the chorus is sung twice at the end of the song, Fogerty sings the “bathroom” lyric the first time, then the correct lyric the second time.

Actually there are entire Web sites devoted to this sort of thing. KissThisGuy.com and AmIRight.com (which also mocks real lyrics) are two sites you might want to check out.

I love mondegreens! I wrote about this during the very early hours of Katrina’s decision to have her way with Mississippi and Lousiana…

Kansas City, Mondegreens, Litanies and Katrina
The origins of the word ‘mondegreens’–

This term was coined when an author was referring to hearing “upon the green” as “mondegreen”. Malachi McCourt, brother of Frank who wrote Angela’s Ashes, titled his autobiography “A Monk’s Swimmin’” which is how the little Irish boys heard the line from the Ave Maria/Hail Mary “blessed are thou amongst women…

My favorite deliberate mondegreen remains “Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy/Kids’ll eat ivy too, wouldn’t you?” That one makes kids roll on the floor when you write out the words for them…I like to make kids RTFL — keeps ‘em where you can see ‘em…

I’m glad to see Senescent Wasp on the comments. I was afraid he’d been taken out by some old jealous husband who’d tracked him down despite his abilities as a chameleon.

Happy Summer Solstice Weekend, Neo…now it’s back to dwindling light. Darn…

In response to almost no demand, here’s as many lyrics as I can recall, through fogged memory:

(To The Dinah Shore Show Chevy Theme)
See the USSR
In your armored car,
Kruschev is asking you to call,
Bring your tommy gun,
we’ll have lots of fun,
shooting West Berliners on the run

(To the tune of Whistle While you Work)
Whistle while you work,
Nixon is a jerk,
pack you sack
and vote for Jack
and whistle while you work.

Whistle while you work,
Kennedy is a jerk,
pack your riches,
vote for Richard,
whistle while you work.

(To the tune of Dovid, Melch Yisrael)
[With NO apologies to trolls!]
Dovid, melech ginger ale,
Chai, chai, pizza pie,
…

Gladly the Cross-eyed Bear

Somewhere, somehow, somebody must have
Kicked you around some
Who knows, maybe you were kidnapped,
Tied-up, taken away, and held for ransom

Honey, it dont really matter to me
Baby, everybodys had to fight to be free
You see, you dont have to live like a refugee
No, you dont have to live like a refugee
Baby, you dont have to live like a refugee

It reminds me of the lyrics aimed at creating such confusion: Marzy doats and dozy doats and liddle lamzy divey, a kiddley divey too, wouldn’t you?

It took me years to learn the translation.

Actual: “Whoa-oh, China Grove!”

(Doobie Brothers)

No way! That’s not the real lyric? I don’t like that song now :\

Short answer. Yep, briefly, very early, cross trained in the days when that was still possible.

Now back to the fun.

Cappy, you have liberated me from thinking that I was the only nut who did this. Boy this dredges up a lot of data from old brain cells that I thought had fizzled out a long time ago:

Wouldn’t it be nice to be Bar-Mitzvah
Saying your haftorah in the shul,
And wouldn’t it be nice to have an Aliyah
Everyone would think that you’re so cool!

Shul, shul, go to shul,
I GO TO SHUL woooo-ooooo
I go to shul….
… I got a black-knitted kipa and it can’t be beat
and it always makes a hit with all the shickses we meet…

Help me Rabbi, help, help me Rabbi!…

We start Shabbos day-ay-ay
On… the night before!

Listen, do you want to say a Bracha?…

Left a good shul in the city,
Davnin’ at the Temple every day and night…

Cohens on the left of me,
Levis on the right,
Here I am
Back in the Temple with you…

Hey Jew, it’s up to you,
Do a Mitzvah, make the world better,
Remember, Hashem has work to be done,
Tikkun Olam will make it better.

Neo, as for mondegreen, some classics I can think of off the top of my head…

‘Scuze me, while I kiss this guy!
(actual lyric: ‘Scuze me, while I kiss the sky - Jimmy Hendrix)

and the all-time favorite….

Blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche into the middle of the night
(actual lyric: Blinded by the light, revved up like a deuce another runner in the night - Manfred Mann)

pledge allegiance to the flag

of the United States of America

and to the republic

for Richard Stans . . .

Sentimental Gentlemen…

A few years ago I learned it is actually Sentimental Gentle One

Possible they are speaking about a female. Who knew?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mondegreen

Yeah, back in the 70’s I was corrected for that particular misapprehension.

In the 80’s, I heard someone mis-sing the title line from the Rolling Stones’ “Beast of burden”:
I never seen your face so purty.
(A Southe’n boy with whom I was in the Army)

word verification: furryzb

It’s much more fun that way.

Well, here in the Bay Area we have the advantage of the San Francisco columnist Jon Carroll’s longstanding obsession with the mondegreen. (Mr. Carroll is a good writer and a very nice fellow but, unhappily, politically very far to the left.)

Here is one of his columns on the subject, this one written, believe it or not, just nine days after 9/11:

Jon Carroll on Mondegreens

Jamie Irons

“There’s a bathroom on the right”

–Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “There’s a bad moon on the rise”.

Priceless, Neo, thanks. Going to look for a Christopher Cross song from the 80’s that had had a line about Ali Bhutto, the late president of Pakistan. I could never figure out how he got in the song.

I heard: “…part time thing, pray for rain”
actual lyric: “…part time thing, paper ring” (you know, the cigar label kind)

from the Beatles’ “Hard Day’s Night”:

I heard: “…but why I love to come home, ’cause when I get you alone…”

actual lyric: “…but why on earth should I moan, ’cause when I get you alone…”