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The Dalai Lama as straight man… — 19 Comments

  1. One with everything!

    Great.

    But the one-sided laughter. That’s the best. Isn’t there an old Irish proverb that says, “Nothing is bad when you’re laughing.”

  2. hahahaha.
    Put an Aussie in with a Marxist Tibetan monk, and you get……….nothing.

  3. I was taking pictures for runway at fashion week. i just decided to take a break… and go get more film.. *yes film… expensive..

    so there i am… standing there… when who should appear walking up the street.. the Dalai lama..

    i said hi, he said hi…
    and thats when i discovered i had no film

    he was to give a speech and such…

    i DID get Barbara Bush and chat for a min..

    but i would have much preferred to hang out with the Dalai lama for a short while… much nicer than Couric..

    but now i know he is a self admitted marxist, i am glad i didnt waste my time…

  4. Next time try telling the Dalai Lama this pizza joke : A fellow walks into a pizzeria and orders a large pizza. The pizza chef asks: should I cut it into six or eight slices? Cut it into six, I don’t think I can eat eight.

  5. The Dalai Lama cartoon reminds me of another cartoon. It shows a woman dressed in a peasant outfit on a country road looking into her empty mailbox. The heading for the drawing was something like, Jean-Paul Sartre writes his mother. The cartoon balloon has the mother saying, “Again with the nothingness. And on my birthday no less!”

  6. That cartoon reminds me of an episode of Metalocalypse, when for Murderface’s birthday, the band gets him the blackest, most brutal birthday present ever………..NOTHING!

  7. I saw some commentary on another site and someone suggested a better joke for the DL.

    After he give the clerk a $20, he asks for change. The clerk’s reply is “change must come from within”.

  8. When I was acting I had to have one of those stupid resumes with special skills listed. Actors would put idiotic things like roller blading and driving, very seriously. So I sandwiched into mine, “Caddied for the Dalai Lama”. Then added some other true skills before putting “Just kidding about the Lama”. It always got laughs after they got that I wasn’t serious. But it also got some funny astonished Wows before they got it.

    I LOVED the Bill Murray monologue on caddying for da lama. And his tip was a promise of total consciousness on his death bed. “So I got dat going for me.”. I laugh just thinking about it.

  9. The variation on this that I first heard about 10 years ago: Question: “What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?” Answer: (in a heavy Indian accent) “Could you make me one with everything, Please?”

  10. Thanks for cheering me up. Now I have to have pizza for lunch so I can tell that joke to the guy who makes the pizza.

  11. Did you hear about the Buddhist monk who went to get a root canal but refused the offer of novocaine? He wanted to transcend dental medication.

  12. The best Dalai Lama joke? Being ushered out the back door of the White House. I wished then he could have turned Obama into a stone water buffalo. Then I realized the actual curse — that he live the rest of his life as Barack Obama — was even worse.

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