Don’t get the tattoo in the first place…
…and you won’t have Melanie Griffith’s problem.
Or, don’t get the divorce.
I was at the beach the other day and I noticed that about half the people walking around seemed to be tattooed. Highly unattractive, IMHO.
In other beach observations, the going rate for a soft-serve kiddie-sized ice cream cone is now four dollars. And a kiddie-sized cone—the very smallest you can purchase—is now the equivalent of two scoops.
Ah, the societal implications in those observations…
Anecdotal evidence can often be worth noting.
The size of the kiddie sized cone – is everything being super-sized? And what may that have to do with increasing obesity?
The tattoos – a deep yearning to be an individual – to stand out? As more people get them, the less they make you distinctive. And so it goes.
Advice former NYSlimes editor Jill Abramson did not heed, she of the Times’ gothic ‘T’ tattoo.
I find it interesting that tatoos have gone, over the last thirty or forty years, from being a rare and daring defiance of societal norms to a commonplace. Once a tatoo told the world that you were someone out of the ordinary: a United States Marine, a Hell’s Angel or someone with sexual tastes that could get you arrested in most states. Nowadays, a tatoo most often indicates that you were able to nag your mom into driving you down to the mall, taking you to Tats R Us and putting the charge on her Visa.
I have always found tatoos rather interesting but I have never been strongly tempted get one myself. To do that I would have to something that was symbolically important enough to me to make it a permanent part of my physique AND artistically of such high quality that I could enjoy looking at it for the rest of my life. Those two factors eliminate about 99% of the tatoos I see (and as I live in Portland, I see a lot!).
Tramp stamps have a pull date — every time.
Generally, the bigger the tats the less interesting the person.
My darling daughter has three tats, courtesy of her service as a Marine; it seemed to be one of those things, you know? Mercifully, she was sensible, and all three are only visible if she is wearing a very skinny bathing suit – and they are classic Celtic calligraphy patterns. Nothing embarrassing like a boyfriends’ name, or a joke tattoo, or something like what George McDonald Fraser’s buddies got in India in the 40s – IIRC, he commented that at least one spelling error was par for the course when it came to a Hogg Market tattoist…
Nix to tattoos. My darling father told me (and I am a grandmother now, so this is old as tombs) that truckers, sailors and hookers have tattoos.
If I wouldn’t have such a picture in my home, why do I want it inked on me—with the same paints that are used on cars?
A tattoo is a permanent response to a temporary situation.
Song of a true tattooe:
A tattoo is a shoe, a heel on the skin, where I say this is my day even when that day has gone away. A tattoo is a blade upon the shade that was in my mind when I made a thought not of all which was right. A tattoo is hugs from my lugs who accompanied me on that night. If I were a pirate and had killed and were hunted and were desperate, I would have my skin pierced with ink and made a record for the victims I had pelted. Otherwise, I have no right.
leigh:
Nix to tattoos. My darling father told me (and I am a grandmother now, so this is old as tombs) that truckers, sailors and hookers have tattoos.
I grew up with the same view of tattoos though I do not recall my parents ever expressing any views on tattoos. That was the way most people viewed tattoos back then.
Those of younger generations than ours apparently do not have the same view.
Will they later regret having tattoos- especially very visible ones?
Time will tell.
My opinion is an attractive woman does not need a tattoo to make herself more attractive, and it won’t help any woman become more attractive. Doesn’t help any guys, either.
Those marks are designed to brand ID on livestock.
It keeps the herd separate.
A tattoo, like a line drawn in the sand . . .
I like the tattoo song, waitforit.
Just as you can’t put lipstick on a pig to dress it up, you would not put bumper stickers on a Ferrari.
Young ladies and gents, take heed.
I just got back from McDonalds where I had a soft serve ice cream cone which cost $1.
I determined in my youth to have no identifying marks.
I haven’t been caught yet.
Leigh,
I just lost a poem, dammit, a song, about a women who had a tattoo but didn’t want it, what she wanted was the best thing, the right thing, a good man, but I hit the wrong damn key, and it went gone.
And it was a good one, dammit. One of the better ones. I hate when that happens. It had a great center, a great person, and a great issue. There was conflict and law and resolution. I suppose it will come back. Maybe someone else will write it.
I hope so.
I’ve never been a fan of tattoos. When our daughter was in college (art school, studying to be a fashion designer) she wanted to get one and we nixed the idea. We made it clear to her and her 2 younger brothers that any tattoos they might get, they will have to get on their own dime, when we are no longer paying any of their bills. They are now 33, 29 and 25 and no one ever got a tattoo. As for the Marines, the 29 year old is presently serving as an MSG. To apply for MSG school, one of the requirements was no tattoos. Unfortunately, under this present Administration, that entire program is being undermined, post Benghazi. I have stories, but alas, cannot share for now.
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On the tatoo as an act of defiance: the most striking example of this that I have ever heard of was that of a private in the French Foreign Legion who had “F*!#**#! You!” (in French, of course) tatooed on the outer edge of his right hand. Thus it would be prominently displayed everytime he saluted a superior. As a result he spent the rest of his military career in various punishment battalions.
Was it an act of rebellion or madness? Or maybe an extreme form of maschosism? Who knows?
How do so many poor people afford tatoos? These are the same ones who can’t afford food for their kids.
My all-time favorite tattoo:
When I was 14 years old I had a summer job pumping gas at a marina. One of the full time employees there – Cecil – had been in the Navy during WWII. One day on the gas dock he pulled up his shirt and showed me the huge and detailed tattoo on his abdomen (and yes, he had a well-established beer gut):
An ostrich with its head buried into Cecil’s belly button.
Tattoos as “art” are wonderfully symbolic of our social decline. I see “sleeves” on grocery baggers at Albertson’s. “Sleeves”, on minimum wage part-timers. Let’s all become Borneoans!
My fave though are tattoos on women just above their gluteal cleft, placed there to be seen only by men who enter from the rear.
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A few comments:
Came across a sociological study a few years ago that concluded that there was a definite correlation between the number of tats you had (I imagine the type of tat figures in here as well i.e. a rose and “Mother” vs. a gang or “prison tat” done on the inside with an improvised sharp, pointy object and some homemade ink) the likelihood that you would be a criminal or had done some jail time.
If you want to get very discouraged, enraged or, perhaps, laugh your ass off about “the human condition,”–and perhaps a combination of all three, I suggest you take a look at the mug shot section of The SmokingGun.com (http://www.thesmokinggun.com/) which, incidentally, also has a tattoo section.
Don Carlos:
With today’s lo-rise jeans, and with bikinis, those tattoos you mention can be seen by everyone.
Wolla, looks like the protagonist, Shephards, from Mass Effect.
Melanie’s bigger problem is too many husbands. The tattoos are just a historical record she’d prefer to forget.
Unfortunately, under this present Administration, that entire program is being undermined, post Benghazi. I have stories, but alas, cannot share for now.
Some of us can imagine what’s going on. We have our sources. Others, have a deficiency in imagination that only time can cure.
I heard this story: a college girl told her parents she was going to get a tattoo. They were strongly opposed but didn’t want to lecture her out of fear that rebelliousness would just make her more likely to get it.
So the parents held a family party and showed some old home movies of themselves and friends from the ’70s. Everyone was in full 70s getup with outrageous haircuts, mile-wide lapels and platform shoes. The audience, including their daughter, laughed uproariously at the ridiculous, dated styles and the parents said, “Yes, but at least we could cut our hair and buy new clothes”. She didn’t get the tattoo.
Along the same lines is a joke I heard once, “If you want to keep your kids off drugs just show them pictures of how people dressed in the ’60s and ’70s”.
Tats are the worst thing ever. And I mean ever.
FOAF beat me to it. Tats will be like 70s hair and clothes in 10 years.
Also a huge class thing.
I just want to scream when I see them and instantly have a low opinion of the wearer.
About 10 years ago I was at the Field Museum in Chicago and this beautiful young girl had this giant tat on her shoulder blades and she was wearing a sun dress. What a mistake! And what a contrast!
Tats are often for the emotionally needy or those with a low self-image. Everyone I know who sports a tattoo usually fits on one of these two categories, sometimes both!
A Team Leader at work sports shorts and legs that are covered in various tats.
One day I saw him dressed business casual.
I asked someone what was up?
He was interviewing for a managerial position.
Like no one knew what he looked like on a day to day basis?
My wife’s uncle (an extremely successful salesman) told our son in the navy to never get a tat below the elbow, then displayed his own under his short sleeve.
Wish our son had listened.
But he did make SCPO and COB.
Not why they’re placed there, Neo, and you know it. They’re placed there to draw attention to that anatomic area.
Only mind readers can read what other people are thinking, especially on a text board.
Ph.Ds think they get that ability from their credentials too?
Never had an urge to get a tat, and after seeing so many really bad ones, including obvious misspellings, I made up my mind to never get one. Especially ugly are the tats on old people that look more or less like a blue smudge after so many years.
Don Carlos:
Perhaps that used to be the case. But nowadays, tattoos like that are displayed for the world to see almost all the time. And in bikinis as well. One can see tons of them at the beach, on women just walking around.
Always thought Melanie’s tattoo was ugly, and kind desperate.
Here’s a recent article about a woman who regrets her sleeve tattoo. I imagine there are many more: “I now think of my sleeve as a form of socially legitimised self-harm…”
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jun/10/sleeve-tattoos-hipster-habit-unartistic-art
I’m 51 and tattoo-free. At this point, I only have two choices: never getting a tattoo, or getting a dragon that wraps across my chest and back, its tail extending down one of my legs. Anything else would be pathetic and conformist.
I have to support neo here, Don, because I have seen those tats on numerous women I have not had relations with, dammit.
FOAF:
Yeah, right. You and Bill Clinton, man, you and Bill Clinton.
Maybe she should check out Dermablend:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mIBKifOOQQ
Me, I just tell people that tattos are against my religion. They look at me wondering to what esoteric religious cult I belong. If I am merciful, I just tell them to check out Leviticus 19:28. (Most of the time, I leave them wondering.)
Don Carlos:
RE: Lower Back Tattoos
Check out the Steve Lynch “Tattoo” sing, third verse.
Tattoos were used to mark slaves as property. Tattoo artistry came about to disguise the slave marking. If you had a tattoo- everyone knew you were once a slave or was still a slave in hiding.
Why would anyone want to mark themselves as a slave?
I have been observing the tattoo scenario for over three decades now and it seems that there are fewer people getting them who have never been inked.
It is so refreshing to see a natural body without these man-made inscriptions. The body is so beautiful.